Dropped off a card at the post office today for my poor brave niece Ashlyn who broke her arm. Here’s the cover.
This picture is a digitally souped-up version of a small watercolor piece I did recently for a baby shower my wife attended. Initially, I intended to do Little Red Riding Hood, but the story seemed a little threatening. A little girl gets accosted by a wolf in the woods and later finds her grandmother eaten up. It didn’t seem a perfect fit for an infant baby girl.
So … I changed it to Little Pink Riding Hood and wrote this rather benign poem that we stuffed in the picture frame. Maybe in a few years they’ll open the frame and find the poem. The original painting in the frame can be seen on the Zach Franzen Illustration Facebook page.
Here’s the poem:
Little Pink Riding Hood
The tale of the girl in the hood that was red
Is known to us all. Though the tale left unsaid
Is that of the girl in a hood that was pink.
The answer for this is quite simple I think..
This girl wasn’t found by a wolf in the woods
Nor troubled while taking her grandma baked goods.
She skipped and she sang on the road without stress.
Her walk in the woods met with perfect success
For there on the path strode a woman in white.
Twas grandma who laughed and said “Oh what a sight!
Your basket looks grand and seems quite full of bread,
And mine contains cheese for I thought in my head
To carry some cheese to your lovely homestead,
But sit in the road and let’s eat here instead.”
They had a fine time with warm bread and cold cheese
And pink riding hood said “why thank you” and “please.”
This innocent tale is routinely o’erlooked
By well-meaning people who find themselves hooked
On stories of danger and tales of suspense
Where picnics and cheer make no good earthly sense..
Perhaps if one day you get bored with the thrill
Of monsters and danger then maybe you will
Return to this story where grandma and child
Enjoyed a fun meeting and ate in the wild.
A slender calico cat named Jack
Sashays like any fine quadruped,
But folks who notice him seem to lack
An obligation to see him fed.
.At noon the calico finds some things
Behind a crate in a garbage bin:
A cane, a hat, and a tie that clings
Around his neck underneath his chin.
.His cane provokes him to stand up straight
And step precisely with both hind feet.
This action makes him seem quite first-rate
To every passerby in the street..
Before too long children come with food
Some chicken, fish, and a plate of cream
This brightens Calico Jackson’s mood
And young ones giggle and clap and scream.
.At last we understand why good Jack
Should walk exclusively on two feet.
Though difficult to develop the knack
Once done, he gets to eat luncheon meat..
So now if ever a stately cat
Comes cross your path on grassy lane
Consider giving him food, a hat
A fancy tie, and a walking cane.
Give a cat a fish, you feed him for a day
Teach a cat to dress, you feed him for a lifetime.
A year ago my wife and I spent five dollars on a bird feeder and a couple more dollars on bird seed. We put it outside the window of our dining nook and have since watched every species of bird promenade through our back yard. We quite often get cardinals, and they regularly appear in pairs. When it gets colder and the other birds move on, Mr. and Mrs. Cardinal will still appear and entertain us while we sip our tea.
Two years ago, the mechanic said that my ’99 Taurus had about six months left in it. Wednesday night, the mechanic confirmed, after several hundred thousand miles, my Taurus is no more. This car was legendary. Despite the enormous abuse heaped upon poor Taurus, it seemed to always respond, “that all you got?”
- In Lancaster PA a girl spun out on the icy road in front of me and sat perpendicular to traffic. My brakes offered no help as I slid into her, damaging the driver’s side headlight.
- On the interstate in Richmond VA, a truck in front of me kicked up an enormous tire remnant which hung suspended in the air like a ribbon and crashed on my windshield destroying the wipers and cracking the glass.
- In Greenville SC in the parking lot of the old Portland Studios, Youths took rocks and a bat to the windshield.
- In Columbia SC a well-meaning driver waved me on, encouraging me to make a left hand turn into a gas station. I waved ‘thank you’ and started the turn just as a pest control truck zoomed past and took off my bumper. I watched the thing twirl in front of my car like a baton.
- Then, two nights ago around midnight on the way back from Alissa’s mother’s house, I swerved to miss a big tire piece from a truck tire, and ran bang into another tire piece, and by far the bigger of the two!
- Taurus drove me around Lancaster Pennsylvania, New Hampsire, Columbia SC, Indiana, Alabama, and Greenville, soldiering on without a peep or a murmur, but even the bravest eventually succumb to death in the end.
At ease, Soldier. Your work is done.